One Year Later...

One year and one month ago I arrived in Zambia.  One month later, at the beginning of October, I began fighting my mystery illness.  As I look back over the past year I see 6 months of a deeply discouraging trial.  When I tell people the story they usually express how hard it must have been for me to be sick so far away from home.  Yes, that was very hard.  But the days I spent at home endlessly ill without a cure in sight, lying in bed thinking about Zambia, were the worst.

Although I look back and see a lot of darkness, I also see the amazing hand of God in every moment.  Hundreds of people both in the States and in Zambia were praying fiercely for my recovery and return.  I had some of the best medical care available, which I am very grateful for, but it ultimately had no role in my recovery.  There is absolutely no other explanation to how I eventually recovered from an ongoing sickness that had no diagnosis and no treatment other than the Lord’s healing. 

Many people are shocked that I dared to return to Zambia, and they tell me how brave I am especially without a clear diagnosis.  But I can’t imagine having done anything different.  What if I hadn’t returned to Zambia?  Where would I be? What would I be doing?  I know one thing for sure: I would be missing out on a lot.  I’d be missing out on building friendships which I expect will last a lifetime.  I wouldn't be experiencing the challenges and joys of teaching in the classroom.  There are 28 future pastors and their wives who would be missing what God has to teach them through me. And most of all, I’d be missing out on all the ways the Lord is breathing life and joy into my heart as I answer his call to serve him here. 

How often do we turn away from God’s will because it doesn't seem safe or logical?  If you know me well you know I am by no means a big risk taker. I like to play it safe in just about every situation: follow the rules, keep both feet on the ground, always (ok, almost always) eat my vegetables. But one thing I've come to learn is that following God’s direction and trusting in his provision is never a risk.  There is absolutely no better place to be than in the center of God’s will.

Since my return to Zambia I have been enjoying strong health for the majority of the time.  Besides some short lived stomach flu's, allergies, and colds my body has been very strong.  This strength has allowed me to invest in my ministry and relationships here with renewed energy and motivation.  I am so grateful for every day, especially every healthy day, that the Lord has allowed me to be here.   

When I was sick people kept telling me that God had a purpose for it and that one day I would fully understand.  I generally don’t believe that God plans for bad things to happen to us, especially if it interrupts his work in the world.  However I do know that “God works all things together for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.” This scripture has truly come to fruition in my life over the past year. 

The Lord deserves all the praise, glory, and honor for his faithfulness in healing me.  And more praise is due for the ways he has been sustaining and strengthening me throughout my last 6 months back in Zambia.  So please, join me in praising the Lord.  For the Lord we serve is indeed a wonderful Lord! J